Day 13 and the week that was!

Well its been over a week since my last blog but it has also been a very busy time. Have been doing a little soul searching, falling off the wagon & am now trying hard to get back to where I was before.

Its time to say goodbye to old habits that continue to rear there ugly head but its so hard! Tea cake of all things has become a weekness & once again coke is creeping back into my diet.

NOT GOOD!!

I know what I have to do but the thing is getting back to the headspace to do it. I am doing gym still whilst the PT is away travelling the world & am loving the classes that we are putting together without the trainer there. It shows how much we have actually learnt from him & especially myself who has only been going there since round 2 & already I have done up a couple of class sessions! I have achieved so much that I should be proud of & that I should be able to easily stay above board but things happen & we all (well most of us) fall off at sometime or another.

I sit here now knowing that there is a full mudcake sitting on my fridge, half a tea cake sitting on my bench, a pack of bikkies sitting on the microwave & 2 bottles of coke sitting in the cupboard. When I am finished this blog post I will bag it all up & hubby can take it to share with his coworkers tomorrow at work! I need it gone otherwise I will just eat it all & I know I will!my strength to say no has faded over the last few weeks & I am not sure as to why or what I have done to have it change. Maybe cause I let my guard down in Sydney although even then I made the healthy choices whilst eating out so I cant blame something that was 3ish weeks ago. This is a mindset that I have got myself in & since I have got myself out of it before, its time to do it again!

I missed adding my weight in stats for last week which were quite pleasing considering I went out drinking for my birthday on the Saturday night. I managed a 600g loss & that puts me back at 70.9kg. Still 300g higher than when I finished round 2 but at least its getting back down there. I hope to see the 60's tick over soon but eating & drinking the way I am that wont ever happen!!

Time for some tough love I think & JFDI. I need to get back out the door on off gym days, I need to look at my goals & see where I am at since afterall I am only 2 weeks away from my first lot of goals! I need to get my head back where it should be. If I am to be one in this little town to wear my newly acquired gym shirt with pride to show off what healthy eating & exercise can achieve, I need to get back to following the plan & back to remember what Mish tells us to do!!

Eat clean & train hard

Cath xoxo

Day 3 - Happy Birthday too Me!

So here it is! The day I turn 34. Now how to celebrate? All the kidlets are at school, Matilda is at daycare, hubby is at work....its just another day in my household! Have had to deal with some issues but working through it & hope it resolves soon.

So onto my day!

Had to eat mighty clean all day (which surprisingly I did!) my special treat was the yummiest piece of carrot cake from our local bakers with a skim hot choc! Oh divine!

Still cant have this without burning the cals right! So walked 3km in morning & another close to 3km in the arvo! Not sure on calorie burn as didnt have HRM on BUT I did work up a huge sweat ;)

Have exercised everyday this week & hope to keep it up! What we start we must finish!

Days 1 & 2 - This is it!

Day 1 - So I was awoken several times throughout the night with a sick bubba. She has a blocked nose & an annoying cough poor little thing! Day started at 5am when alarm went off for hubby for work. I didnt mind since real estate was coming out to do house inspection as they do every 6 months. Speaking of house inspection, I have spent the last 4 days scrubbing, wiping, cleaning & also catching up on washing since the weather has been craptacular. So glad we have some glorious weather!

So getting back to it all, day started early. Had myself a yummo bowl of porridge for breakkie & washed it down with a cup of green tea. Ready to face the day now! Anyhow got it all done & inspection went so well that it was a less than 5 min visit of walk in say yep all good & they walked out!! 4 days of scrubbing, cleaning, washing etc & they didnt even look! Ah well now I get to enjoy a VERY clean house & what better way to start of my next round of 12WBT than without mess.

I had gym class at6pm & it was the first class without our PT! It was actually quite fun & was more a group of girls out for an arvo run/workout. We did some laps of the AFL oval, some sprints then finished it all off with some ab work. All up it was a 953 cal workout sesh so I am happy with that.

Ate clean all day other than the couple of bikkies that slipped in but still under cal count so not all a disaster. Still have to stop that munching though! Have to also work on getting to bed at a decent hour!

Day 2 - Once again woken by the alarm at 5am but didnt get up this time. So glad I have older kids as they got themselves off to school & Tilly slept through until 9.30 as did I *gasp* Havent been feeling the best over the last few day & think I may be coming down with what Tilly has. Trying to soldier on though & obviously must have needed the sleep too! I even laid down on the lounge today whilst Tilly slept & had another 2hour sleep then! Once up though I had to get the brain & body in the right mood to JFDI & get out the door.

I got myself into workout gear.....half way there so thats good right! WRONG! It still took me another hour of arguing with my inner teenager of how far I would walk or how long or how many cals burnt to aim for before I looked at the time, realised how late it was & finally got out the door! I managed to do 3km pushing Tilly in the pram uphill & down & burnt 400 cals so it didnt turn out a total loss. Tilly loved it too so as long as weather holds out I think ill make that a daily thing.

Been good with food but still slack with water so have to work on that area.

Its my Birthday tomorrow so red flag day for me! No cake but will be sure to get myself a nice big bowl of strawberries, banana & yoghurt ;) Who would have thought it would take me 34 years to realise how unhealthy my life has been! Well I am just so happy that I have found that healthy & exercise is good for the mind, body & soul. Better late than never! Happy 34th to me for tomorrow :)

Cath xoxo

Alright whats the go here? Where has my positivity gone?

Had a bit of a breakdown today when thinking about all that I hadnt achieved over the last 12 weeks. Have been listening to so many talk about doing City to surf or some other fun run or even a 7hr boot camp. It got me thinking

"WHAT DID I DO THAT MADE ME STAND OUT?"

Answer to that is nothing. I did absolutly nothing that made me stand out in the crowd. I did plenty that I am proud of myself such as being able to run my whole 1km, doing my own triathalon, getting on the cross trainer & pushing out 14km to match up with the city to surf peeps BUT it was nothing it contrast to what many other 12WBT participants did.

Why am I questioning my achievements? I should be happy with how far I have come right? Well why am I so down about not achieving higher? I missed our local fun run which is a 9km run from Lake to Lagoon as it was held on Sunday & I was travelling home from Sydney. It was a tough choice for me to make to give up as it is something my whole gym class entered.....every one of them but not me.

It is easy for people to say, just enter these runs etc next year but it all takes money! Money that we dont currently have. I could do my own run of course, but where is the fun in doing it on my own. No sense of fun nor achievement. Just boredom & no support to finish.

So that brings me to now. I have to be happy with where I am now. I have to be happy that I am being the best I can be. I have to be happy that I may only have 5-6kg to lose & there is no prizes to be gained from this program other than self satisfaction. I am thinking that I should have not wasted money on doing round 3 since I will admit I am a competitive person & knowing that I am always at the low end of the scale should make me happy but in the same token I feel so disappointed when my losses are so tiny. I am feeling that I am just wasting the time of Michelle, of Amelia, of the 12WBT team/family. I has such a wonderful weekend yet now I seem to have hit rock bottom & feeling lower than ever. I am not worthy of the praise & compliments that I have gotten since I have done nothing to deserve them.

So why am I feeling like this? Why cant I just get on with it, get the job done & applaud those that do have the weight to lose? I have met some pretty amazing people over the weekend & I do hope to form lifelong friendships with them but & there is always a but isnt there....lol. But I can never achieve the highs that alot of these fabulous people have already achieved or will achieve. I have to be happy with me & I have to be happy for who I am. I need to be able to take a compliment & I need to believe the person who is giving me said compliment actually means it & is not just saying it to be nice.

Must find that positive Cath that has been around since Sydney. She has disappeared & has left the old Cath that is doubtful & always questioning herself. If you see her please send her back as I am currently feeling very worn down & tired. I also think once this house inspection is over on Monday, perhaps I will start to feel a bit better! I will be 34 on the 22nd & want to be the happy person that has been here since Friday! Even looking through pics of the weekend are upsetting as here I was thinking that I have 5kg to go when really its prolly alot more since my hips/thighs are just ginormous! I am still the frumpy person I was last round albeit in smaller sized clothes!

All the excitement of Round 2 is over & the reality of round 3 is setting in. I failed not just myself but I broke my promise I made to Michelle in the final 4 weeks. Even Mish was disappointed in me then & I felt that when the raw truth of me not putting in 100% was told. I am so worried that I am going to fail again even though I dont want it to happen!

Until tomorrow, eat clean & train hard!

Cath xoxo

Pre Season Task 6 - Kitchen Makeover

I am proud to say that I went to clean out my cupboards but only the essentials were in there anyhow! There was no junk food, no chips, no soft drink & not even a bottle of cordial since we now have ourselves a fancy water cooler!

Looks like when going to the shop I am going to take close to exact money so that the junk food isnt got as a spur of the moment thing ever again since that is how the junk gets in here now!

My bench always has a bowl of fresh fruit on it rather than packst of bikkies etc.

I have obviously learnt something from round 2 but need to stop the shopping snack trips!

Preseason Task 5 - Say it out Loud!

“My commitment is to get through round 3 without falling off the wagon as often as I did in round 2! I plan to get there with the support of my family, my 12WBT family & also Michelle and Amelia. I promise there will be NO KFC incidents & that chocolate will NOT be my friend. I am committed to do the work to get me there”.

This is our virtual handshake. *I put my hand out now & do the virtual handshake with you*

Pre Season Task 4 - Gear Up

Well this was a soul searching one for me last round since we struggle a little with money & therefore there wasnt much left over to purchase all the fancy stuff needed to get through BUT we did manage to get me some good runners & also a HRM! All my clothes are just specials from Target or Kmart but hey they do the job! I am hoping to one day deck myself out in some decent brand label gym gear but I have found that it isnt something that should stop me from exercising! Thanx to a lovely round 2 person I now own an adidas tank top so yay loving it & just in time for summer!!

I plan to do my workout jsut like last round. 3 times a week at the gym & the rest ill go with the flow & either utilise the outdoor program or do a dvd. My PT is actually heading overseas for 5 weeks (was suppose to be 5yrs but he changed his mind and will only go for summer camps). He is leaving our class (there are 5-6 of us) a few full class routines so that we can keep up the work whilst he is gone. There cant be any slackening off since he has warned us that he will be back & we had better be prepared to be smashed….lol.

I plan to utilse everyday this round to do something. I became complacent throughout round 2 since in my circuit class I was burning over 1000 cals a class 3 times per week. I did manage a couple of weeks of 1000 cals per day but didnt stick with it for long. I am hoping to smash up this next 12 weeks!! I have to before the 45+ degree heat kicks in here.

Pre Season Task 3 - Set Your Goals

My 1 month Goals!

* I will be running at least 1.5km non stop
* I will be able to do 10 pushups on my toes!
* I will continue to keep with my healthy eating plan
* I will continue to follow Michelle's instruction
* I will continue to attend the gym 3 times a week
* I will continue to do at least 20km on the cross trainer (on off gym days!)
* I will continue to drink 2 litres of water
* I will have lost at least 1.6kg

My 3mth Goals!

* I will be running at least 5km non stop
* I will be able to do 30 pushups on my toes!
* I will continue to keep with my healthy eating plan
* I will continue to follow Michelle's instruction
* I will continue to attend the gym 3 times a week
* I will continue to do at least 25km on the cross trainer (on off gym days!)
* I will continue to drink 2 litres of water
* I will have lost at least 6kg & be at my goal weight of 65kg!

My 6mth Goals!

* I will be running at least 8km non stop
* I will be able to do 40 pushups on my toes!
* I will continue to keep with my healthy eating plan
* I will continue to follow Michelle's instruction
* I will continue to attend the gym 3 times a week
* I will continue to do at least 25km on the cross trainer (on off gym days!)
* I will continue to drink 2 litres of water
* I will have be maintaining my weight of around 65kg!

My 12mth Goals

* I will continue to attend gym 3 times a week
* I will be running at least 10km non stop
* I will be able to do 50 pushups
* I will be able to do 50 burpees in succession without stopping
* I will be able to do 50 crunches with no break
* I will be able to do 100 situps with no break
* I will continue to keep with my healthy eating plan
* I will continue to follow Michelles plan even though 12WBT is finished
* I will be able to do at least 40km on the cross trainer
* I will continue to drink 2 litres of water at least every day
* I will have been maintaining my weight and be weighing in at around 60-65kg!
* I will be fit, healthy and I WILL LOOK AMAZING!

Pre Season Task 2 - Get Real No More Excuses!

Excuses? What are they again?

Oh yes the things we try to tell ourself when we dont want to do something!

Internal Excuses
No motivation
Too tired
Dont feel like it
I cant keep up
I will fail before I even start
I just dont want to do it anymore!

External Excuses (within control)
Too busy
Its too wet and cold
Had a tough day with the toddler
PT is away so no reason to head to gym
Dont want to walk/exercise alone

External Excuses (outside my control)
Sick kidlets! Although I had my fair share of hospital visits in round two & other than one incident I was prepared for the next trip when my toddler fell ill.

The above are just Excuses. They are the BS we tell ourselves to make us feel better about why we dont want to do something. Starting tomorrow isnt good enough as you shouldnt have fell off today! This is round 3 & since I am not a newbie to the world of 12WBT I think my excuses have all but run out



Cath xoxo

Pre Season Task 1 - Introduce yourself!

Well here we go again but its all good for the mind to keep on track :)

Hi all,

I am Cath from country NSW! I am a stay at home mum & housewife. For those that have done round 2 with me, they will know that my journey has not only been about weight loss but also a journey of finding myself. I also have come to realise that this is my personal journey & that just cause everyone else is losing large amounts, that does not mean that I should be depressed if my amounts are small.

During round 3 I am aiming to lose those final kilos which is somewhere around the 5kg mark! I never would have thought 12 weeks ago that I could say I only have 5kg to lose!!! WooHoo!!

For me the 12WBT has not only helped me eat better, but also my family is eating better! One of my teen daughters actually commented the other day at how much healthier she is feeling & the energy she now has!. Without this program I would still be lost in my black hole that I had been in for so long. Michelle & Amelia have both helped me realise that I am worth it BUT only I can lose this weight. This is something only I can do. No-one can lose this weight for me!

April 28th 2010 was the day I quit smoking cold turkey! Who would have thought that 5mth later I would still be a non smoker, not even craving for the nicodemon anymore & I am now running (although a little injured atm). I go to the gym 3 times a week & the rest of the time I am full time mummying/wifeing to my hubby & 4 kidlets (16,14,11,2). I am turning 34 on 22nd September & I know that this birthday will be one of many to come now I have made the healthy choice to get my life on the track it should be!

Sending Great big hugs to all those who are part of my round 2 family and are her for round 3 and sending more hugs to those new peeps starting the transformation journey & are due to become part of my family!

Mwah! xoxo

The finish line!!

Well alas all good things must come to an end and that is what has happened to round 2 of the 12WBT! After 12 weeks of smashing it up & eating well, the finish line has been crossed!

Have enjoyed the most amazing weekend in Sydney which could have only been made better should my hubby have been able to come. So here is how my whole weekend panned out!

After leaveing Junee at around 8.30 Friday morning, we finally arrived at Novotel Darling Harbour to check in at 2pm!! Was texted by Jo at 3.30 to say that the 12WBT crew were downstairs! Nerves set in  I as like hmmm do I hide in my room or do I JFDI & get out the door. One thing this program has taught me is not to be scared or nervous & to just do it. Dont think about things too much as your mind will always over think the situation. My first challenge was here & it was time to face it.......meeting people!

I am so glad I went down there as I ended up having a fabulous afternoon with some truely amazing people! Mind you, I did have my can of confidence which helped immensely. Next hurdle was to go to dinner & meet even more people! A big thank you to Amiee & Jess for pretty much not letting me even think of not going! Heck they even chauffeured me there. I will never forget 3 laps of the city then turn left to get to destination....haha. Dinner was great but I headed off for an early night & once again Jess & Amiee were kind enough to chauffeur me back to my motel. Much sleep was to be had now as big day coming up!

Saturday - D-Day has arrived! Got all dressed & ready to go, visited the markets for a while & met up with an amazing lady whom I hope to have as a friend for a long time! Suzanne & I walked to training & had a great chat about many things including how I have known her sister on another forum for close to 3 years!! amazing!

First up was the training sesh! After a quick warm up it was 1km time trials! I put myself into the intermediate group. I ran my time the fastest ever 5mins 15secs!! I think I have a new goal of getting in at sub 5 now ;) Training sesh was set into 3 groups, strength, running tips & cardio! All 3 trainers worked us hard! I knew that I would be sore in the days to come but I didnt care as this pain is GOOD pain!!

Finally hurdle of the weekend was going to dinner in a dress & heels! I dont wear dresses or heels so this was my final step. I had got through everything else so once again I JFDI & got out the door. The night was amazing & I got to chat with some truely inspirational people as well as made some new friends that will hopefully be for life!

The winner of 12WBT Round 2 - Bev!

No prizes were won by myself but honestly who needs a prize when you have your life back? I am living, breathing & enjoying it so much right now. I have an amazing family who love me, I have a massive group of amazing friends who all take me for who I am & most of all I have learnt so much in the last 12 weeks that is just a prize within itself.

12WBT for me changed my life & it changed my families life. I am now so ready for round 3 as well as dare I say it possibly preparing for next years City to Surf ;) Shhhh its a secret though that my hubby told me I should do but who knows!

Mwah to Mish, Amelia, all the Ambassadors & the 12WBT behind the scenes crew. You are all so wonderful & amazing. From me, I thank you so much! Mwah! xoxo

Cant believe I took such a good shot after so many champagnes! #proud

So here I am signing off from round 2 & getting ready to start posting my round 3 blog! I will keep it all on this one since Time to Lose it For Good is what I am planning to do! 20th September is the starting line & I am ready to face this challenge head on once again!

Final Week & Weigh In!

SW: 74.4kg
CW: 70.4kg
WLTW: 200g
WIW1: 73.8kg
WIW2: 73.7kg
WIW3: 73.3kg
WIW4: 72.8kg
WIW5: 72.2kg
WIW6: 72.0kg
WIW7: 71.8kg
WIW8: 71.3kg
WIW9: 70.8kg
WIW10: 71.3kg
WIW11: 70.6kg

GW1 - 73.4kg ACHIEVED 08/07/10
GW2 - 72.5kg ACHIEVED 21/07/10
GW3 - 71.5kg ACHIEVED 11/08/10
GW4 - 70kg
GW5 - 68kg
10%GW - 67kg
EGW - 65kg

Chest: W1: 88cm Wk4: 87cm Week 8: 85cm NOW: 83cm (-5cm)
Waist: W1: 88cm Wk4: 85cm Week 8: 80cm NOW: 78cm (-10cm)
Hips: W1: 95.5cm Wk4: 95cm Week 8:92cm NOW: 90 (-5.5cm)
Thigh measurement distance from knee: 33cm
(R) Thigh: W1: 57 Wk4: 54cm Week 8: 53 NOW: 52.5 (-4.5cm)
(L) Thigh: W1: 58 Wk4: 54.5cm Week 8: 54cm NOW: 52 (-6cm)

BMI is also down to 25.24 & I have lost 5.4% of my weight so far

So that is my totals for the 12 weeks. Not great on the weight loss but 25cm in total loss I am happy with 5.4kg till my goal weight of 65kg! Then ill go from there.

So there you go! Thought I would add in my fitness test results as well!

1km time trial was 6 mins 44 now its 5 mins 40!

Pushups in 1 min was 12 Now its 25!

As for my goals for at the end of 3 months, lets have a look & see how it all went for me!

* I will last through a whole circuit class session without stopping - DONE
* I will be running at least 3km non stop - DONE
* I will be able to do 15 pushups - DONE
* I will be able to do 25 burpees in succession without stopping - DONE (although from about 15 they get sloppy...lol)
* I will be able to do 20 crunches properly - DONE
* I will be able to do 15 situps properly - DONE
* I will continue to keep with my healthy eating plan - DONE (but have slipped off wagon a couple of times!)
* I will continue to follow Michelles instruction - DONE (although I think I will get a boot in the backside when she sees me...haha)
* I will continue to attend circuit class 3 times a week - DONE (hoping that my PT gets replaced with someone just as amazing as he is. Cant beleive he is going overseas & staying there. He has helped me so much on this journey with getting fitter!)
* I will continue to do at least 20km on the cross trainer - DONE
* I will continue to drink 2 litres of water - DONE (I do slack off sometimes!)
* I will have lost at least 6kg and be weighing in at around 68kg! - FAILED!!! This is my failure of the round. I only weigh 70.4kg I need to kick my own ass for this!

So there it all is in black & white. Here is a quote from a post I put up on the forums this evening looking back at how far I have come now!

Last October I weighed in at 83kg. I was feeling fat, frumpy & nothing fit. I even was wearing a size 16! This was the biggest I had EVER been. Normally I am 60-65kg & in a size 10-12. I tried losing weigh myself & did manage to get down to 76kg but the weightloss stalled & thats when I discovered Mishs program! It was April this year & I decided first of all I had to stop smoking…...I did….cold turkey! I then impatiently checked my email everyday up until FINALLY we could sign up for round 2!

Now round 2 is over I can look back at what I have achieved instead of dwelling on what I havent or didnt. I had a few meltdowns & even had tears today. Tears are good though & I have learnt with every breakdown there is a breakthrough.

* I am now weighing 70.4kg
* I am still a non smoker & have no intention of taking up the habit again
* I can now run as well as run on the treadie at a speed of up to 12.4!!
* I am doing full 1hour classes instead of spending half of it on the sideline huffing & puffing
* I am making healthy choices with food & drink!
* I have gone from a size 16 to a size 12 so far!
* All in all I have become a better healthier person!

BEFORE SHOT (taken October Last year. Size 16!)

AFTER SHOT (taken last week. Size 12!)

Now to look forward to a great weekend in Sydney from Friday to Sunday! Cant wait to meet all the amazing 12WBT family who have also helped me on my journey. To Mish & Meels, you girls are amazing! Even over the internet your inspiration beams to all of us! Its those little tweets that keep us going & help achieve what I have. I may not have lost the most weight but I am proud of my achievements exercise wise! It is you ladies that helped push me to get to this stage & yes I might have done the work but it was easier knowing that you were both there as well as the 12WBT family. My family too has been wonderful. Eating all this weird & wonderful food just so that I wasnt doing this alone. Mwah to you all! xoxo

Here is to Round 3 & once again I will continue this blog on another chapter of getting to my goal weight! I hope to share with you all some pics after the weekend as I will be braving it & wearing a dress & heels!! Oh god who would have thought!

Week 11 Summary!

11 weeks have gone already & who would have thought that I would be sitting here now looking forward to the 12 week weigh in, measure up & fitness test! I remember back to week 1 when scales were evil, measuring was daunting & running....oh gosh what is that word you speak of! Now I sit here wondering what the numbers will tell me both on the scales & with the measure up & running how I love it!!!

So here are the stats all up so far! Not too bad at all & only one week during the whole program so far was a gain. I am hoping to finish off with a bang and hopefully be into the 60's. It will be a task but here is crossing fingers! I have also reached a few goal weights I have set myself along the way to keep me motivated as well.

SW: 74.4kg
CW: 70.6kg
WLTW: 700g
WIW1: 73.8kg
WIW2: 73.7kg
WIW3: 73.3kg
WIW4: 72.8kg
WIW5: 72.2kg
WIW6: 72.0kg
WIW7: 71.8kg
WIW8: 71.3kg
WIW9: 70.8kg
WIW10: 71.3kg


GW1 - 73.4kg ACHIEVED 08/07/10
GW2 - 72.5kg ACHIEVED 21/07/10
GW3 - 71.5kg ACHIEVED 11/08/10
GW4 - 70kg
GW5 - 68kg
10%GW - 67kg
EGW - 65kg

BMI is also down to 25.31 & I have lost 5.1% of my weight so far

So 700g loss on the scales this week. Made me a happy little camper since week 10's weigh in wasnt so great. I must have been good since this has to be a record for me with having no tweets from Mish ;) Miss them though as its amazing how a tweet so simple as keep it up from Mish or Meels can pick you up & keep you going strong! This is one of the many reasons I am coming back for round 3 which will start shortly!

Will do up another blog shortly but for now its adios as I have a toddler who requires mummys attention.

Week 10 summary!

Well what a rollercoaster of a week. I registered my first gain (500g) even though I thought I had been so good with food, I have found that I have possibly done a damage to my groin muscle & it hurts badly then to top it off my poor little baby girl got herself an ear infection so bad that I think her eardrum may have ruptured. It at least explains the no sleep for 2 nights leading up to that though.

During those 2 nights was terrible. The first night I was so strong & kept so clean with food. The second day was terrible. I missed breakkie, managed to have some baked beans on toast for lunch, skipped snacks then at least had a decent dinner of steak & steamed veg. It was later in the night things went down hill. I found myself snacking on chocolate & also drinking coke. What the hell was I doing!! I was reverting back to old ways & habits which got me into this predicament in the first place. I had always snacked on sugary foods/drinks to keep up the energy that came when you go countless hours with no sleep. Now I am doing it again!! I am so glad that by Saturday night the anitb's had kicked in as well as the nurofen & panadol for the pain. Finally she was sleeping & slept through till 9.30!! I did the same! The sleep was amazing & refreshed me enough to rethink my commitment!

So I have 2 weeks of round 2 left! I have to do some pretty kickass stuff to get me in shape to make my goal that I set for this 12 weeks. I have also had a pretty rough time with sick kidlets the last couple of weeks too but again that is all jsut excuses!! Tiredness makes us do some stupid things sometimes so to combat that I have thought ahead & now have yoghurt's & le rice in the fridge that I have noted for myself to grab instead of the chocolate & bikkies!

I am also going back to basics. I had slackened off using Calorie King but have now gone back to it since I want to track exactly what I am eating! I have also found myself resting on the days when there is no gym class since I have got in the mindset that burning 1000 cals per class is enough for 2 days! BAD BAD BAD! It isnt good enough & I must go back to 1 rest day. I may have hurt my groin muscle BUT it doesnt stop me from exercising. I have amazing support from my hubby & my kids with this so I should start listening to them. Noone judges me more than my 11 year old son who even takes stuff off me if he thinks I shouldnt be eating it. He too has taken on healthy ways in little things such as having a ham salad sanga instead of some junk food takeaway when he orders his lunch. We are the ones who set the example!

Now for me to put this inner labrador, teenager whatever you want to call that horrible person who makes us do & think things we shouldnt, back into her box!! I had her there for a while but she is back & she is bad!

Time to finish round 2 with a BANG & hit round 3 head on!

A new day or a new beginning?

My leg is feeling much better after icing all day yesterday. I must thank Melissa for all her help & advice yesterday! I think had I not taken it, today would have been spent in alot of pain & tears. Mwah to you!! It is amazing the people who do this program & its not jsut for people who want to lose weight, it is also for people who are looking to learn to eat healthy as well.

I joined this program for round 2 back when the sign ups first started. For me I have gone through 9 weeks officially but also 4 weeks of preseason tasks. During that time I have learnt so much about everything & not just food. I am learning about who I am as a person and what I want from life. I am learning that whilst yes I am a mum, I am also a person myself and I think most of all I am doing amazing things I never thought I would do!

Michelle Bridges program is for EVERYONE! It is amazing how something as simple as eating healthy with regular exercise can teach us so much about ourselves. My whole family is starting to eat healthy & my hubby is eating what I eat. The children are all slowly getting in the same mindset but after many years of preparing packaged food the look of those green things on the plate might take some getting use too. I go to the gym 3 times a week & have an amazing personal trainer! He knows how far to push us & when we are slackening off. We rarely use the gym equipment since he feels a better workout is achieved when you use your body as it should be used! I love my classes since it is 1 hour of time for me. No interruptions for mummy business so no excuses! My Tuesday Zumba classes are the same! I love the time out. It is what has put my sanity back to where it once was & I am finding that I have alot more patience with the children again.

Round 3 is starting on 23rd August & I will be once again treking on this journey. Michelle & Amelia are amazing. Many times when I felt it was all over just a simple tweet from Mish or Meels (M&M) is enough to pick myself back up again & keep on going. I have seen this with many of the 12WBT family.

Tonight I book my accommodation to come to Sydney. Tomorrow I go shopping for something nice to wear. Afterall, coming to Sydney means I am coming to meet my whole other family. A group of people who I know will take me for who I am & not who I am not. They will not judge & they are the closest group of people anyone could wish for to be a friend. I also know that even though I hate the camera I really have to get that elusive #photowithmish plus we all need a pick with Jo & Capt dont we ;) I know that night I will possibly be in many photos sharing a smile with all my new friends.

Thank you Michelle for such an amazing program. I am sure that I am not the only one from the 12WBT team that salutes you! /salute

Cath xoxo

NO! Not now please!

Well had an amazing sesh last night at gym! There was only 4 of us so the PT pushed us hard & I pushed myself harder since I just havent been feeling it anymore after gym. Was a high cardio sesh last night too!!
 
He had us start night with jog round the block followed by 4 lots of 2 mins step then 30 star jumps! Went on to some more running (sprints) over diff distances then back to the gym. At gym we did boxing but with a difference!......he had us doing all our boxing moves whilst holding 2kg weights!! Did 4 lots of situp sets (30 situps/10 oblique crunches each side) then 1min lat holds (no wonder I am losing cms off my waist…lol) He then told us to to do 1/10s with mountain skis! (for those that dont know what these are you do 1 mountain ski, then 10 sprints, 2 moutain skis 9 sprints etc. basically one exercise then runs!) Finally to finish the sesh he took us outside & had us run around the middle island on the road for 12 mins non stop! 1 lap would have been about 400ish meters I think. We had to get at least 10 done in the time with sprints up & down the hill while the ends used for recovery…...it was this that caused my pain. On the first lap I felt instant pain in my upper leg but passed it off as a cramp. By the 5th lap I was near in tears with pain but knew I had to keep going! I am a 12WBTer & we dont give up easily! Also the voice of Michelle in the back of my head telling me to suck it up princess helped me with my decision to not stop! On my last lap the PT decided to push me hard & ran with me so I too pushed myself. By the time I left the gym I was limping. I must add though I did burn a whopping 1153 cals in the 1hr session!!!

I havent had much sleep all night cause of the pain & hubby feels that I have done a hamstring damage. He has made me promise that I will do no exercise other than a walk to the shop if needed & that I will keep ice on it through the day.

Why does this happen now when I was looking so positive at everything? Now It is possible I could be set back with my exercise :( I guess it will help keep me honest with my food intake though. Gym tomorrow night but will get PT to organise something a little different for me so hopefully that is possible!

Exercise & keep it clean everyone!

Cath xoxo

Weigh in week 9!

SW: 74.4kg
CW: 70.8kg
WLTW: 500g
WIW1: 73.8kg
WIW2: 73.7kg
WIW3: 73.3kg
WIW4: 72.8kg
WIW5: 72.2kg
WIW6: 72.0kg
WIW7: 71.8kg
WIW8: 71.3kg

GW1 - 73.4kg ACHIEVED 08/07/10
GW2 - 72.5kg ACHIEVED 21/07/10
GW3 - 71.5kg ACHIEVED 11/08/10
GW4 - 70kg
GW5 - 68kg
10%GW - 67kg
EGW - 65kg

BMI is also down to 25.39 & I have lost 4.8% of my weight so far Did I mention that I am also back into size 12 clothes! I have bugger all to wear now that fits anymore! I got myself a pair of jeans & a shirt the other day so I at least have something nice to wear out! Other than that its all gym gear.....haha. So now I have to look around for clothes for me!

Forgive me Mish & Meels for I have sinned

(rather than type this up again I have copied what I posted on the 12WBT forum!)

Yesterday was a bad day. It didn’t start well & it didn’t end well.

After being up all night with my very sick 11yo son, I knew that the day would be hard! I kept thinking of all my work & cals burnt during the triathalon on Friday hoping it would get me through! It wasn’t enough & I wasn’t strong enough to stop the inner voice :( I am devastated to think that all that time working out on Friday has now been consumed in 1 days eating. I just know that this week those scales are going to punish me! I deserve to be punished for my stupidity.

Breakkie wasnt so bad as I did have fruit. Lunch wasn’t all good though. 2 bits of cafe toast with a cup of green tea. Not too bad but not the best either. As the day dragged on & my son got sicker, I could feel myself becoming tired and exhausted. Here I was on my own trying to race around after a 21mth old toddler as well as be there for my boy & try to cool him down since he had a temp that wouldn’t break. Now things went downhill & just kept going down fast!

Instead of grabbing for a cold bottle of water from the fridge, I grabbed for the coke, instead of grabbing for an apple, I had a small piece of dark chocolate then after a trip to the hospital with my son I just gave up trying to fight. I had a maccas heart approved (or so they say) sweet chilli wrap with seared chicken. If I had of stopped at that it would have been fine but nooooooooo, I had to have 4 wicked wings too! About the only things I did do that was ok last night was wash it all down with water!

I don’t even want to begin to work out the calories I ate yesterday but I know that I am devastated. I cant believe that I let myself become that weak to the point where I was making bad choices. It was sleep deprivation & exhaustion that put the weight on me in the first place! I should know this & I should know the signs. Last night though I gave up all to easily.

I am sorry Mish & Meels for letting you down.I am sorry to myself for letting me down. I shouldn’t be doing this stuff. I should be aiming to get to my goal weight not falling off the wagon! I guess though we learn from each time we fall. We pick ourselve up, dust ourselves off & we hit the road again! This is important I feel. It helps shape us for those times when yes one night over indulgence may happen BUT its the getting back on the clean road quickly that counts.

Cath xoxo

Week 8 Triathalon. I DID IT!

After being ill last week & not having a chance to even have a go at the triathalon, I decided that I should still at least do this & do it this week!.

We had a choice of a few different variations that we could do. I was going to to the orginal intermediate challenge which was 3000m Row, 25km bike ride & 6km treadie run, but decided to shuffle it a little & instead of the bike ride, I would incorporate my Saturday morning circuit class in there instead.

Thursday after gym circuit the PT announces that we would be backing up Friday night instead of Saturday morning! I was like, are you kidding I am set for Saturday now I have to psych up for tomorrow instead. Since he had footy training on on Friday night he also said that if I wanted to do this then I would have to lock up the gym! Yep only in a country town do you get full use of the gym facilities ;) At least not having a cut off time means I had no excuses but to finish what I started!

So 5pm I rock up to the gym for my 1hr class. PT decided to mix it up a little & go full cardio! A 1hour class that consisted of sprint sets, situps, pushups, boxing, 1/10’s (which is where you do 1 pushup 10 sprints, 2 pushups, 9 sprints etc), more running, more situps, more pushups, more boxing, core ties. Basically lots of ouchieness!!

I was stuffed when class had finished but knew that this would not be the end of my session for today. Not by a long shot! I still had 3000m rowing to do & not to mention 6km on the treadie! I decided to get the rowing out of the way since if needed I could always walk a bit of the way on the treadie to get through. Love the rower at our gym since it is a water one! almost feels like the real thing! 20 mins later & I was done! With that part anyways! 6km to go! I was hurting but knew I had to go on & finish!

Treadie wasnt all that bad. Managed to keep up at around a pace of 9km with every 30 secs going up to 10km then 11km then back down to 7km for 1 min back up to 9km etc. Finally after around 45 mins, the 6km ticked over! WOOHOO! I had done it!

2hrs & 15mins of non stop exercise for a total calorie burn of 2113!

Who would have thought that I could do something like that. I was a bit down since the family didnt seem to really understand what was so huge about my achievement especially considering dinner was late for me to do this but some lovely 12WBT ladies helped me to see that what matters is that I did it and I know that I did it!

So to sum up

Circuit Class - 1hr 10mins
Rower - 20mins
Treadie - 45mins
Total Cals burnt - 2113

Thank you Michelle for my little surprise in the mail this week!! <3 xoxo

Week 8 weigh in & Measure up!

SW: 74.4kg

CW: 71.3kg
WLTW: 500g
WIW1: 73.8kg
WIW2: 73.7kg
WIW3: 73.3kg
WIW4: 72.8kg
WIW5: 72.2kg
WIW6: 72.0kg
WIW7: 71.8kg

GW1 - 73.4kg ACHIEVED 08/07/10
GW2 - 72.5kg ACHIEVED 21/07/10
GW3 - 71.5kg ACHIEVED 11/08/10
GW4 - 70kg
GW5 - 68kg
10%GW - 67kg
EGW - 65kg

Chest: W1: 88cm Wk4: 87cm NOW: 85cm (-3cm)
Waist: W1: 88cm Wk4: 85cm NOW: 80cm (-8cm)
Hips: W1: 95.5cm Wk4: 95cm NOW:92cm (-3.5cm)
Thigh measurement distance from knee: 33cm
(R) Thigh: W1: 57 Wk4: 54cm NOW: 53 (-4cm)
(L) Thigh: W1: 58 Wk4: 54.5cm NOW: 54cm (-4cm)

BMI is also down to 25.57 & I have lost 4.2% of my weight so far ;)

Only 4 weeks to go but I have already decided I am signing up for round 3 which starts in a couple of weeks!

Week 7 & time to reflect a little

Well it had to happen sometime didnt it. After being so well all winter I woke yesterday with a bit of a sore throat which now is dry, sore & my nose is blocky too :( My poor little bubba is sick as well. Took her to the doctors on Friday to find out that she has a middle ear infection.....IN BOTH EARS! Needless to say she is now on 5mls of amoxil for the ears, 3.5mls of dymadon for the temp & 2.5mls of Dimetapp DM for the runny nose/cough. She was so sick last night that she threw up everywhere after coughing so much. Breaks my heart seeing her like this. My son has just gone back to school after being off for almost 2 weeks ill as well. So it was just a ticking time bomb I guess that I would get it sooner rather than later! Even my hubby has trekked off to work today ill.

So that brings me to my blog today! Its time to sit back & reflect on what I have achieved over this time on Michelles program. I have had a few down days but they are so normal in any journey that happens. Nothing can be perfect can it? Writing it all down seems the best way to keep me focused especially now I am not well, so that I can keep on the path for a good weigh in this week! Its a big one again with measurements, weight & fitness so want it to be spot on!

Signing up to Michelles 12 week body transformation program is one of the best things I have decided to do for myself. Not only am I eating healthier now but my whole family is eating healthier. They still have there chocolate etc but it is now a treat & not something that is pigged out on in one sitting anymore. Heck a block of chocolate now lasts us almost a week in this house (unless my eldest chocoholic daughter finds it...lol). We are drinking alot less softdrink. 1 small glass with dinner is all that we have if any. Big improvement on a 2lt bottle in a day! Hot chocolate drinks are now the Jarrah kind (with no extra sugar added) instead of several scoops of milo topped off with the cup filled with marshmallows. Food wise my whole family has changed although the kids are stillg etting use to all these different sorts of vegies since we were the regular chops, mashed potatom peas & beans family....haha. Now its fat trimmed off whatever meat we are having, sweet potato, zucchini, eggplant, capsicum etc. Very different household now and our cupboards/fridge/freezer reflect that change!

As for fitness, well I shocked myself when I got onto the treadmill on Thursday night BEFORE gym class to warm up! I decided to go 15 mins or 2km (whichever came first!) So on goes the machine up to 8km.....too easy...lets go up to 9, nope push it out before I knew it I had the treadmill on 10 with incline of 3 & I was doing it. I was running easily! Normally I sit the treadmill on 7 & just fast walk since always been scared to run on one of those but after Thursdays effort I loved it!! I looked down to find that in just 11 mins I had already killed off the 2km I had planned. So off with the machine & I did some stretches before the gruelling session during circuit class with the PT. Class was a little tougher than normal but I was expecting that! Stocked to see cals burnt though for the 1hr 15mins was over 1200!! Was starting to feel the effects of getting sick on Friday so didnt test it out again but will once I get better!

I would NEVER in my wildest dreams 11 weeks ago have thought that I could come this far. I had tried to lose weight on my own with no help, no programs & just by using what I knew from internet searching since October last year. Although I didnt do too bad overall I never stayed on the wagon when there were weeks the weight wouldnt budge. I just gave up! Doing Michelles program though I always have her little voice in the back of my head getting me going, making me feel guilty if I make a wrong decision & best of all supporting me in my journey!

Since October last year I have lost

Weightloss: - 8.7kg (3.6kg since I signed up on Michelles program)
Chest: - 10cm
Waist - 10cm
Hips - 13cm
Thigh (R) - 6.5cm
Calf - 2.5cm
BMI - Is now down to 25.74 after being up close to almost 30!!

Total  - 42cm GONE FOREVER! With more to lose still.

Michelle has changed my life so much. I know try to find postives in a bad situation. Like today, I made a promise I would do some sort of exercise but since I am ill and after chatting with a few of the lovely people that are also on this journey with 12WBT, it is best for me to rest & get well quicker, than it is to push myself and be out of action longer. So I will take there advice and make sure that I eat VERY clean so that no exercise wont hurt on the scales too much come Wednesday. I was hoping for a big loss but I think I will be happy with anything. If there is a gain then I will come back to look at this blog entry so that I can see the results in black & white and that I have come a long way to the person I was almost 12mths ago!

Forgot to add the best part EVER! I am now back into a size 12 ;) It has been over 3yrs since I was in those size clothes that I had forgotten how nice it was to shop for regular clothes! It was nice to be able to go out in real clothes wearing real shoes. Instead of trackie dacks & joggers!

So to end this blog I have just one thing to say

Thank you to Michelle & you 12 week body transformation program! It is wonderful to finally see a program out there that is NOT a diet, but a change of the way we do things in life. A healthier change to doing things I might add.

MWAH! xoxo

To go or not to go? Yet again I question my actions!

Dates for the party have been released for the weekend of 10th-12th September. This was my reward for my hard work over the 12 weeks but now it is seriously looking like I wont get there now. The thing is that this is something purely for me and that seems selfish considering we as a family havent been away on a holiday together since hmmm I dont remember when. We did manage a couple of days in Sydney last year, but that cost us a fair bit & although we had fun, we spent the nest month or two reorganising & paying out bills we had put off to go.

At the moment we are in a position where yes all the bills are paid, but they don't just stop coming in. There will always be a phone bill, electricity bill, car payment there no matter what & i would prefer them to be paid then to put them off all for a few days of joy.

I have been looking forward to this trip now since I signed up to the 12WBT program. I became even more excited when I sat there the night of the round 1 party on twitter whilst Cyndi kept us updated with all the fun. The night sounded amazing! Not to mention meeting Michelle Bridges who is just the biggest inspiration for any person trying to lose weight. I would finally have that pic with Mish that I see the round 1 peeps talking about. Everything was perfect until I actually thought about what it would take to get there. The cost :( I thought of staying with friends up in Sydney but then since I don't drive would mean relying on public transport & hey, people are scary when you are travelling alone. Especially in Sydney!

I have thought about staying in cheapo accommodation & even catching the train up to make cost cheaper but it still doesn't stop me thinking that even doing that why am I getting time away to have fun? I am a mum to 4 children who are lost when I'm not there since I do so much for them & a wife to an amazing hubby who works so hard to make sure that I am happy. When it comes to family, I am the luckiest person in the world. They are all just amazing. So for me to go away, means that if hubby comes, we would need a babysitter to which whilst we were gone we would worry that the kids were OK anyhow which doesn't make for a good weekend. Then there is if hubby stays home with kids & I go alone to make costs cheaper, that I wouldn't have much fun since hubby & I are 2 parts of the whole. We don't operate well without the other so to speak.

We have never had alot of money since I chose to be a full time stay at home mum. Hubby has worked his butt off though to make sure that we have a roof over our head & food on the table. We do it tough as in we cant afford the luxuries in life but we do have everything we need to get by. That is what brings me to this decision. Every year at tax time we get that little bit extra. Last year we went a bit silly, went to the footy in Sydney a couple of times, took the eldest kids up to see around Darling harbour as they had never been before but then there was the harsh reality of the pile of bills that didn't get paid to enjoy that time. We ended up getting out of the rut but it wasn't easy. It meant that hubby went to Sydney with work for 8 weeks to pull us out of the hole we had dug ourselves & all for what? A couple of fun weekends in Sydney.

I don't want to put us in that same position again. We have a little bit of money in the bank that normally I would be like OMG SHOPPING! I find myself thought thinking that it would be waste of money too! Our TV keep just turning off & wont turn back on without unplugging it but hey, it still kinda works. I promised myself a new Adidas trackie as well as new shoes from athletes foot BUT & here is the clincher.....why waste the money when I have cheap clothes to wear to gym & I also have shoes to go on my feet? Funny thing is, if this was for the kids.....it would have been booked & paid for weeks ago along with a new suitcase full of clothes to take. When it comes to things for myself it doesn't seem as important. Heck the only reason I signed up with 12WBT was because I hit a very dark scary place in my life & hubby told me to do this as its something only I can do. I had to justify the cost! Do you believe that!!! In the end I took up the weekly payment plan which I have even struggled to have the $20 a week available some weeks yet here I am trying to plan a trip to Sydney which is looking like costing me well over $500 & that is just accommodation & flights. To top it off that is just for me. Not the family (heck would be loads more if I took the family).

This is something that I do want as I would love nothing more than to meet Michelle & Amelia as well as the amazing new family I have with all the 12WBT'ers, but I also have to remember that sometimes life doesn't go how we want it to. I myself am not worth putting before my family & having that small breathing space of money in the bank.

To be honest, as much as I would love to go & in my head I know I deserve it, my heart says that family has to always come first. 12WBT program has literally saved my life. Not just by helping me lose weight, but by helping pull me out of a dark hole that I didn't think I would ever get out of. I know one big thing that I still have to learn in life & that is to put myself first sometimes, but those with kids & a hubby know that one is tough even with all the money in the world. I know that I will always put family first but perhaps I need to reward me as well for what I do on a daily basis?

Tonight is a prime example of putting others first, hubby is at work, my eldest daughter knows I have gym this evening yet she has planned to go shopping. That means no gym for me tonight as I cant leave Tilly here with her 11year old brother. At least my girls will have some fun anyhow as long as they still go of course. I best be planning a smashing workout since gym days are always tough ones but the PT gives us a good workout! Might dust off the cross trainer & see how that goes! Hopefully things will become clearer in a few days and I will be able to make a choice for the best for everyone then! If I don't go, I guess that night will be spent with those on twitter who couldn't make it either. Besides there are things that I still don't like about myself that I dont know if I want others to see. The weight my be going but there is other stuff about my appearance that I am horribly embarrassed about and wouldn't want to be judged, laughed or spoken about. Its not something that I want to put up in my public blog just yet either. Lets just say though it would be noticed immediately & I am not one for smiling when out & about so I guess that is another reason to hide at home too. Its taken me all my courage to go to gym with other people because of that too.

ETA - I hope this makes sense as it was kind of written whilst I had a bazillion thoughts going around in my head!

Weigh in Day Week 6! The good & the bad!

I call Wednesday my 'day of truth'! It tells me if I have been working hard enough or if I have slackened off! My results so far :-

SW: 74.4kg
CW: 72.0kg
WLTW: 200g
WIW1: 73.8kg
WIW2: 73.7kg
WIW3: 73.3kg
WIW4: 72.8kg
WIW5: 72.2kg

GW1 - 73.4kg ACHIEVED 8/07/10
GW2 - 72.5kg ACHIEVED 21/07/10
GW3 - 71.5kg
GW4 - 70kg
GW5 - 68kg
10%GW - 67kg
EGW - 65kg

As you can see the numbers are going down (albeit slowly) but I guess I should be happy with that. I have been trying to work out why the small loss this week. It could be a number of things too! We have been doing alot more weights at gym, 2 full on cardio sessions last week including the Friday session where I had my breakdown pretty much, then there is the fact I took the weekend off & relaxed to give my body a rest as well as time to recover but I was back into it again Monday evening with a smashing 1000 cal circuit again and then backed up last night with a 700 cal Zumba class!

So its not from lack of effort with exercise and food is being weighed out although I have laxed a little on that.

So now its back to basics!

I will go back to weighing all my food & putting it into Calorie King!
I will make sure that I am eating as close to my 1200 cals a day
I will smash up my circuit class sessions with the PT
On days off I will make sure I get up & do something even if its JM 30 day shred
I will make sure I am drinking my water EVERYDAY & not just gym days
I will recommit myself 110% back to Michelles program!

As my blog title states.....its time to lose it for good....that does NOT mean time to lose a bit now then the rest later. Best to do it all in one go ;)

Oh & guess what!! I managed to actually full on RUN 700m most of which was uphill. Gosh I was stoked.

A break down or a break through?

Fridays Gym Session


Since there were alot away from Wednesday nights class, the PT decided to do yet another high cardio session. It was different to what we did on Wednesday but I could feel my body was still tired. I thought I would be fine once I got going. I was wrong! We did a slow jog to our local school and used there netball court. I dreaded what was planned since we had only been there Wednesday. It was more intense tonight since we had the real fit peeps back too. We were paired up & trust him to pair me up with the fittest person there.

Our missions was to do 1 min of jabs, ` min of uppercuts, & 1 min of air punches, followed by 20 pushups (if on knees or 10 if on feet) then it was off running 1.3km around the block of the school which is on a massively big hill. (the person boxing did this whilst the other stayed back) The person who wasnt running stayed back & did 2 full laps of netball court, then run to end of court & back (x3), 3/4 line & back (x3) 1/4 line & back (x3), 20 pushups, 20 situps 15 steps (on those horror steps from Wednesday). We had to do this twice each. The clincher though was when the PT said we were competing against eachother. The losing team would have to do 50 burpees, next in 30 burpees & first in 15 burpees. I almost wanted ot be sick then since as I said I was with not just the fittest person but also one that is so competitive.

So first round I decided to do boxing & running. I didnt do too bad & things were looking good. I wasnt coming first but I was at least keeping up. Cause I was slower thought than the others, I didnt really get any sort of recovery in between. On my partners turn to run, she wasw back so fast but I was still finishing off the exercises back at the school so held her up. I was starting to feel so tired but I pushed on. Came time for me to run again & that is when it all crumbled. I was running but I just wanted to cry. I pushed on as I was hurting, I could hardly breathe & that was scareing me as each breathe became harder & harder. I jsut couldnt get the air into my lungs. I felt like I was back to that first gym session and starting out. I ended up slowing back & walking to try & recover a little. It didnt last long cause then the thought of letting my partner down came into my head & I was devastated. I wasnt doing this for me, I was doing this for someone else too. I didnt want to do 50 burpees nor should she of had to either cause I am unfit. It wasnt fair. Why was I put with her. I got back to the school & it was her turn to box. I couldnt stop apologising to her & letting her know that I was trying so hard. She was great & said that it was fine. To me though it wasnt fair! Not for her that she was stuck with a turtle like me.

Each round she would get us in front, when it came my turn I would put us further behind. It was when it was her turn to run the second time after I had already done my 2 rounds that whilst doing my workout on the netball court I broke down. I couldnt breath, I was a mess. I was still going & pushing through but that wasnt the point. I was sore, I was aching & I didnt think I could do much more. once again I thought of the 50 burpees I was making my partner have to do with me all cause I was slow. That was it, I broke down. Tears were flowing down my cheeks. I felt like a wimp! The PT & the girls there were so wonderful though. The PT asked if I wanted to have a rest to which I said NO! I am not going to quit, I have to do this! then I got cheers from the girls who got me through the rest of the way. One of them even came back to do the exercises again with me so that I wasnt doing it alone. They were amazing and I think I even shocked my PT who couldnt beleive that I may not have been as fast as the others.....I FINISHED! and what was even better I had still done everything everyone else had done.

I came down from my bit of a high when I remembered that shi!te....50 burpees. I asked the PT if we did them here or back at the gym since we did lose. He said 'No burpees today!, you did well enough to not have to worry about them, as did everyone else" He also went on to say how happy he was with all of us.

I got thinking last night after chatting to a few ladies that are doing the 12WBT program & wondered what my breakthrough could be since with every break down there is a breakthrough so it is said. Well at the end of the day, I did finish. I didnt keep up & I didnt

To all my friends thank you so much for your tweets last night & also FB posts. I really needed them and do feel so much better knowing that I am making a difference to people, even if it is a small one. Now i guess its a point of keeping on, keeping on! I have a party to attend in Sydney on the 11th September and hopefully I will be able to go as well as get a bit of spoilage for all my aches, pains & sacrifices over the last 3 months.

What a crappy week it has been but its not all bad!

What a week. I almost gave up & threw it all in only yesterday.

I had weigh in on Wednesday where I managed to lose 600g! Stoked I was yep!. After my horror eating week I still was lucky enough to record a loss. I am now down to 72.2kg which is the lightest I have been in 3 years!! Lets hope I can continue on with this and keep the numbers going down!

I will do this up into 2 blog entries so that the one from last night is the most recent and so this one isnt a monster entry.

To cut a long story short, we are waiting on monies to come through from the Austrralian Tax Office as well as Centrelink. Well......neither has any idea when it will be paid /sigh. I even rang the treasurers office (Wayne Swann) to be told they would enquire about it & have it fixed up & paid through by yesterday.....fat load of crap from the current government since they didnt even call. I then rang my local member (Kay Hull), so sad that she has retired from politics as of 19th July but her office is still open until her seat is taken over on 21st August. What a shock I got when I had a phone call within about half an hour of talking to her office from a lady at the ATO. She explained why my Education Tax Rebate was being held up (lodged on 1st July) and that I should definitely have it by 2nd August. Not what I wanted to hear but I guess it will have to do. Looking at it, its only another 8 days away. Centrelink said that the link with the ATO can stay open for up to 14 days but feels my supps will be through by weeks end. then to top it off the date for party was released and it was all over from there since I really thought I couldnt go as it was on my bubs 2nd birthday. Devastation central here for me....such a drama queen huh.

Rewind a little though. I had been so down about trying to work out how to pay things out that I one again punished myself. My breakfast consisted of a cup of tea, lunch was shocking though! Choc biscuits, choc cake washed down with a hot chocolate! OMG why! I wont say it wasnt good but god I felt so nauseas afterwards. I wasnt even going to gym since I could really afford to waste the money on the class but I went anyhow.

It was here that things got interesting. Our workout was once again a full cardio session. I had one of those just on Wednesday night. I should probably explain what we did Wednesday so you have some idea of the workout I was still recovering from. (I will put Fridays sesh in it own blog entry)

Wednesdays Session
It started with a jog/run to the park. We then had to do 20 pushups follwed by a 600m run uphill & back, 20 burpees, 600m run uphill & back, 20 starjumps, 600m run uphill & back. Oncde done we were given a 2min recovery time. Then it was onto more running work. There were 4 witches hats set along at intervals. We had to run 7 times to the furthest (1 was counted as up & back) 7 to next and so on. There were 3 hats to run to. 30 secs recovery & it was time to do 5 of each, then 3. We then ventured to our local school to make use of there netball court. PT had us doing steps up 2 of the hugest steps ever (more like those cement seats) then it was a sprint up & back of the netball court. The numbers we had to do them in were; 15 steps, 1 lap up & back of court, 10 steps, up & back of court, 5 steps then up & back of court. Needless to say the legs ACHED badly afterwards. Back to the gym & it was there that we still had more to do. 100 situps, 25 pushups, 50 situps, 15 pushups, 25 situps, 10 pushups. Finally to finish off the session it was 1 min each of the following: burpees, pushups, standing lunge, starjumps, skis & situps. I thought I would be cheaky in our big situp sets & use a weighted medicine ball (10kg) So that is 175 situps with a 10kg medicine ball!! No wonder I was sore and the abs couldnt even cope when I laughed I ached so bad.

To be continued in the next entry!

Why am I sabotaging myself?

Well here I go again! Same thing I do everytime the weight starts coming off. I become complacent & relax on my morals when it comes to food! Its just not right when I have been eating right for the last 8-9 weeks!! There has always been chocolate of some sort in the house or oreo bikkies so its not like its a new thing!

Yet I find myself grabbing a chocolate (snack size one) here & there, as well as when I get up through the night to make Tilly a bottle I am eating 1-2 oreos!.....like WTH! I know that I will feel like shite after I eat it so why do I continue to put myself through this. Why am I trying to sabotage what I have worked so hard to get rid of? Seriously, what is my problem!

On the other hand I am eating well for my main meals & snacks (IF I have my snacks), I am also exercising regularly and am even pretty much burning close to if not going over the 1000 cals per day! Maybe I need to up the anti so that I can feel myself working for the loss. At the moment its a case of gym 3 times a week, zumba once a week then I just have to fit in 2 more days which I do easily since living in the country you can always walk somewhere or I can get on the cross trainer. I have really no excuse not to be working harder. Consistancy is key as burning 1000 cals is norm for me now.

So what do I do? I have to get out of this mindset that I am putting in the ard work of burning the calories therefore a few chocs will be fine! ITS NOT! I dont want to throw away all the work I have done to get to this point. Once again I am letting not just myself down with every chocolate I eat, but I am also letting down Michelle & Amelia who work so hard to put this program together to keep us honest. I am so glad I have this blog so that times like this I can write about it and hopefully get some insite into what the hell I am thinking!

I have gym at 7am tomorrow & after last nights intense weights session i am hoping we do a full cardio session! If the PT does, then I think I will push myself so hard that I WILL feel the burn, I WILL know that I am working hard and most of all I WILL use this as punishment for my relaxing on this when I know I shouldnt be!

Will check in again tomorrow as I think I need to blog daily! It seems when I do, I keep to my word & keep to my mission!

I havent even done my fitness test yet :( I think I am scared of not doing any better. I also look at these fabulous mini milestones people have planned & I just have no idea what to do. Running a whole kilometre would be a milestone for me but its no where near the calibre of the mini milestones chatted about :(  I am also down since one pair of size 12 pants I have do up so I went & purchased another (albeit from vinnies), got them home & there is no way I will get them done up. Here I was thinking I was so close when in fact I am no where near it! Breaks my heart & also my will power.

MUST KEEP STRONG!

No exercise for 2 days makes for lots of work to do!

So I woke this morning with the motivation to JFDI! sick or not I wasnt sitting around doing nothing.

I went for a nice close to 3km run & whilst out I did run most of the way!1 I also smashed a new PB for the mile according to my Nike +ipod program! Not bad for a sick one hey ;) 300 cals in 20 mins....yep Ill take that ;)

It wasnt enough though so I managed to finish Jillian Michales 3 day shred (level 1). I havent done it in ages as I jsut couldnt get through it all.....I again surprised myself but not only finishing it without stopping but also managing to do all the moves pretty much on the higher level (other than damn pushups...haha) Again another 300 cals gone in 20 mins!

Once little Miss Matilda finally goes down for her arvo nap (if she goes down), i will finish up my day with time on the x trainer! I have done a bit of everything today and feeling load better! Although I think I have sweated off bucket loads which is so not usual!

Have fun, eat well & smash those cals!

No Super Smash Saturday for me today but lots of rest & water!

Didnt get much sleep at all last night. Tossed & turned as well as got woken by hubby who was in & out of bed. It would seem we are both ill BUT here is the funny thing.......I am alot better than he is. My tummy might be a little upset & I have a bit of a fever as well as body aches & pains but hubby is suffering really bad! He was on the toilet ever half hour last night (sorry for TMI) & was feeling like crap. I wonder if its cause of my new healthy way of life? all the exercise & the water drinking that is helping my body fight this infection & keep me kind of feeling ok?

So there was no gym for me at 7am this morning! i was so peeved too. My eldest daughter said I should have gone & took a bucket....haha. Gosh she is funny sometimes ;) I now have until 6pm Monday night before gym is back again so time to ease back into things AFTER I am well again. If tummy is settled in the morning I might go for a nice walk (weather permitting) or if raining then I have the cross trainer here so will just have some slow going on that for a little bit. dont you hate how life throws you a curve ball just when things are getting so great! So glad I worked my butt off this week with cal burning though! 5k cals is great for the week & is helping me feel not so guilty as I sit here typing this up now.

I have at least had some breakkie today & also managed to eat a Le Rice without the tummy churning too much. Head is still pounding & body is still aching so not going to push myself too much at this time. I smashed it up with the cals all week so a couple of days off isnt going to ruin my work! just have to find what to eat that is not only healthy but also good in the tum.

Might go lay down for a bit before hubby comes in from work as well as before the ltitlest bambino wakes up. Hope this isnt around for too long! I was just starting to enjoy my new found fitness & dont want to be knocked back down to where I was. In the same token, no point doing a damage that could have been avoided just but resting for a day or 2!

My challenge may have been shattered but I still managed over 5k cals in 5 days!

I did forget to add day 4 update! Went back over to Wagga & did a little more walking but didnt take my HRM this time (damn!) Hit up the gym where once again the PT set us a massive session! Started with what we thought was a jog & then that turned into indian trains!! (where the person at the back of the line has to sprint to the person at the front & take there place) I was doing well till near the end so stopped to walk it out a little.....PT had other ideas when he told the rest of the group they had to keep running until I got through to the front!! DAMN IT! SO I found myself pushing so hard to find that bit more to sprint to the front!! I was so happy to say i JFDI and got applause from the other ladies in the class for doing it! I actually ran/jogged the whole part of that sesh other than a 2 min breather!

Back at the gym & it was weights, pushups, burpees, situps (with 5kg medicine ball), seated rows, planks, standing rows with 10kg weight, leg magic machine, steps with weights, boxing  & we had to spend 2 mins at each station!! When we had done one full round it was time to do this crazy sprint thing. It was 5 pushups run 10 laps of gym, 5 pushups, 9 laps of gym etc til lit was down to 5 laps of the gym then it was swapover with other group! While the other group was running, we had to do continuous situps!! Abs are feeling it today too!! Hope I am well enough to go tomorrow as I do love seeing how much better I get each session!

Cals burnt = 957

In 5 days I have burnt a grand total of 5084 cals & that included the couple of hundred I managed today even though sick. I could look at it that I can still complete this since 6000 cals burnt in 6 days was the main aim BUT I also had the 1000 cals per day in there too so really would be cheating if I even did manage to get to gym in the morning. Maybe I have pushed myself too far but I doubt it since hubby isnt feeling well either. I really am crossing fingers that I can eat something tonight & keep it down then I can look forward to class in the morning. Otherwise perhaps a light walk around town might have to suffice till the body repairs.

My challenge has been shattered :(

Felt great this morning but by lunch time I started to feel a little icky in the tum. Thought a lay down with Tilly would help me feel a little better but woke up feel worse :( I managed a walk to burn around the 300 cal mark but that is no where near my benchmark of 1000 cals I wanted to burn everyday for 6 days.

I AM DEVASTATED!

I am thinking that I am going to have to rest this one out since not eating cant be good if exercising. It would jsut lead to injury or mass fatigue. I havent eaten since breakkie & its not from lack of trying either. I have on emouthful & jsut want to hurl. This isnt fair nor is it something I expectied since I have felt so well. My young fellow had a tummy bug a few days ago. We thoughr maybe food poisonming but I am wondering now if it was actually a 24hr tummy virus? Whatever it is I hope it passes soon. I am even contemplating giving gym a miss in the morning since I think going on an empty tummy is one thing but going on a tummy that hasnt had food in it for almost 24 hours is not a good thing at all.

Will try something light for dinner like toast maybe & see how that goes. I have some soup here so might give that a go with some toast. Hubby called from work saying he has the same thing. If it was something we had eaten wouldnt the kids be sick too? We havent had takeaway either!

I am going to crawl into a corner for a while & have a cry I think. I so wanted to get this goal done & whilst I came close I didnt cross the line. I have let myself, Ameila & Michelle down :( I will have to make up for this....I just have to!

Weightloss so far!

SW: 74.4kg
CW: 73.3kg
WLTW: 400g
TWL: 1.1kg
WIW1: 73.8kg
WIW2: 73.7kg

GW1 - 73.4kg ACHIEVED 8/07/10
GW2 - 72.5kg
GW3 - 71.5kg
GW4 - 70kg
GW5 - 68kg
10%GW - 67kg
EGW - 65kg

Slow & steady does it. at least the scales are coming down now & not jsut stuck! Not to mention I am feeling so much fitter to!!

All up I have lost 2.1kg since signing up with Michelle Bridges! So happy!

The trek for 1000 cals a day continues!

Day 3 - (Wednesday) I managed to burn my cals the weirdest but in the same token fun way today! Joys of living in the country is shopping isnt all in one place. Walking from one end of the main street to the other several time is a workout in itself. Those who have been to or live in Wagga would know that walking from Market Place to Rebel, back to Sturt Mall, up to Warehouse, down to target etc is a pretty fair distance

Anyhow I was adventurous & wore my HRM. In 3 hrs I had burnt a whopping 1467 calories! I also passed on maccas for breakkie since I managed to get in a couple of bits of toast before we left. I also was strong enough to say NO to take away lunch. I figured it was only 1 more hour till I was on a bus home so I would wait (much to the disappointment of the kidlets but there butts will thank me one day….haha!)

So whether it is cheating or not, ill take those cals as burnt fair & square since only those who know Baylis street know that yep you can work out & shop

My running total for the week so far is 2360 + 1467 = 3827 cals GONE!! Woohoo!!

Also got a Wii today (well Haydie did for his birthday from Aunty Bobbie) Next purchase is the Wii Fit Plus with the Jillian Michaels game (kmart has a spesh on it atm) Does Michelle have a game out on the Wii? Will have to do some searching over the next few days!

I also was in bed by 9.30 last night! The littlest bambino was have a shocker night sleeping as has been the norm for the last 4 nights so I went & laid with her. Before I knew it hubby was coming to bed & it was 11.30 *shock* You would think I would feel good today but nope not when you have a 22mth old waking every couple of hours going from her cot to your bed! I could do with more sleep I tell ya!

1000 Cals per day for 6 days!

Well this is what myself & another 12WBTer are doing for week 3

Call us crazy (we prolly are) but this is our little challenge. In with this challenge is also to eat clean with no slip ups & also drink at least 2lt of water each day!

Just to bring you up to what I have done!

Day 1 - (Monday) Ate clean & came in at around 1100 cals eaten (including a treat of a hot choc in the arvo) water intake worked out to almost 4 x 750ml pump bottles of water!
Did a walk early in the day & then smashed it up at circuit class in the evening. Total cals burnt = 1297

Day 2 - (Tuesday) Great with food as well as water! Went for a run (3km in which I did another PB of getting through 3km in less than 25mns!). Once home I set myself up my own little circuit. Did some boxing, 10km on the x trainer, pushups, situps, burpees, start jumps, crunches as well as core ties (this is what my pt calls them not sure how to explain them. Held it for 50 secs though so that is good!) Total cals burnt today = 1063 cals!

In just 2 training sessions I have burnt 2360 cals! Cals that are gone forever!!

Now here is hoping that I can keep on this little wagon I have set for myself. At this time I am feeling great! Not sore (yet) & keep to get it done.

So here is to 1000 cals per day & crossing fingers that by the weekend, I have tossed over 6000 cals!!

Can I do this….lets hope so!

Who said healthy cant taste good!

Last nights dinner was what I have pictured above! A delish mix of chilli & beef. I am not a chilli person since I really dont like spicy BUT this was so different. there was a slight hint of spice but not alot. It was just nice. Oh by the way, this is called Chilli Beef Stir fry. I am loving the food that is available that is also low in cals! I can get use to eating like this very easily. This one is in at 323 cals! It is also made on rump steak too!!

 Tonights was just as good. Cajun chicken with sweet potato wedges & avocado salad! I was a bit up in the air with this one since I have never had avocado! Yep thats right, I am an avocado virgin!!! I had heard so many bad things about taste etc that I never bothered & avoided it. I have decided that I will try anything (within reason as I still dont think I could eat skippy!) during this 12 weeks. Just in a couple of days I have eaten chilli, avocado as well as salad sides I never thought I would!

I am amazed at how much I had been over eating! My portion sizes have been cut in half pretty much and even though I am eating less, I am just not hungry! These meals that Michelle has set up for us actually keeps us full enough that I dont even really need to have any snacks! Its good to have them there though throughout the day just incase!

Anyhow enough food talk & onto my day! I have had a wonderful day with not only food but also with exercise! after gym class being cancelled last night I was so down since I had only done my fitness test so had burnt no where near the allocated 500 a day! I made it my mission today to make up for it and I did! I managed 13km on the cross trainer in 33 minutes then moved onto Michelles strength workout! Ouch ouch ouch! I managed to do all that was required though including the 400m jog. I followed all this up with a 30 minute walk since I had to go to the shop anyhow. Total cals burnt.........1087!! I couldnt believe it. Gym is back tomorrow night so will be doing those sort of numbers again although I dont know how my body is going to pull up in the morning since I am a little sore this evening.

First official weigh in tomorrow. Not really expecting any change since I havent seen anything for 3-4weeks on the scales so why would now be any different? At least this will put the 12WBT family weighing in on the same day!

Until tomorrow, eat healthy & burn those cals!

Fitness Test is all done!

Well to start the day I had a doctors appointment! Nothing bad just a quick check up to make sure everything was ok. All is fine & she was even kind enough to give me a compliment of I already look amazing conisdering I have 4 kidlets. I said to her and I quote "I might look amazing to you but I dont feel amazing to me and that is why I am doing this". She thinks that my head is in the right place to be doing something like this without going overboard.

Fitness test was next. 1km time trial done! 6 min 37 secs! I am stoked considering we did a 1km time trial 2 weeks ago at gym where I registered 7min 55secs!! That is a major improvement in just 2 small weeks for my fitness. So here are my stats from the test!

1km time trail - 6mins 37secs (Intermediate)
1min pushups - 12 (Beginner)
Ab Strength test - Level 2 (Intermediate)
Wall sit - 30sec (my god this burns the thighs! (Beginner)
Sit & Reach - -5cm (Beginner)

Use the 1km time trial, pushup, and abdominal strength test to determine your exercise level for the 12WBT.

So that puts me in the Intermediate catagory! So much for me being unfit. I best be looking at the exercise diary now to see what Michelle has planned for that level /shock

4 weeks ago I dont think I would have even made 1km let alone been able to do a pushup! Doing this today has shown me fitness wise just how far I have come. Have been great with food & water today  too.

Breakkie - Oats with 1 cup of low fat milk
No Snack
Lunch - Pea & Ham Soup with 1 piece of bread
Arvo snack - ForMe Satisfy yoghurt
Dinner - Beef Stirfry (Mish Recipe of course)
THEN NOTHING AFTER DINNER OTHER THAN A CUP OF GREEN TEA!!

I have also managed to get through 2 pump bottles of water today but still more to go! Not worried since il get that in no probs at gym tonight.

Feeling pretty good right about now!!

Tomorrow is kick off!

Meal plans are in, shopping is done & exercise regime will happen! Michelle has explained how it all works and how for us girlies there is no more than 1200 cals per day to be eaten. This is also including 300cals worth of snacks (so 2 x 150cal). They do not have to be eaten though.

Fitness test is to be done tomorrow! Time trial of 1km be it run, walk or crawl as well as pushups, situps etc. I will have to get it done in the morning since that is the time this week that will put me at close to 100% since circuit class is on Monday, Wednesday & Friday this week. I did a 1km time trial only last week  during gym so can also have a look & see how I have improved over just 2 weeks ;) I feel in myself I am already fitter than I was a week ago and I know that I will jsut keep getting better as long as I keep this up!

I am feeling a little nervous now since it is really official. Michelle Bridges is my Personal Trainer!! Wow! Never though I would be able to say that in this lifetime. I didnt even have to qualify to go onto The Biggest Loser for this to happen. I do feel the 12 Week Body Transformation is an amazing program that brings wonderful trainers like Mish to the little people like me. I am sure I will be inspired by her & other members to get the job done & to really nail it this time! I will finally get back into the 60's again and with Michelle & Amelias help, I am sure they can help me get there.

So there it is folks. I will update hopefully daily as to how I am going and feeling. 6 days a week exercise with NO EXCUSES! Must remember to get myself some kitchen scales too.