Monday, May 31, 2010

So far down but back on the up again!

Well what a few days I have had. I hit a very real low point on Friday after just not getting any sleep with Matilda. I was pleased with myself that I didnt turn to junk food as I normally would have though ;) I did however skip exercise on Friday (other than a quick walk) and nothing at all on Saturday. Its quite weird how you can feel so horrible within yourself that you jsut dont want to do anything. I was like that on Friday. A mix of being tired and cranky all jsut caught up and I almost broke down. I spent the day crying mostly and feeling very horrible. Not even a walk made it feel better.

By Friday afternoon though I was feeling so much better after taking what Michelle had told us all about excuses and put it into play with my real life and not just exercise! I made a plan to hopefully get Matilda to sleep and I sat down and got stuck into some of my uni work that was just piling up and late. I actually organised myself by just doing it and finding a solution! Made life so much easier to get through what I would call almost one of my darkest days.

I have alot to get through today so going for a long walk shortly so that the exercise is done and dusted for the day! Otherwise by afternoon I know the excuses will be coming out and its also a bit too cool to have Matilda out in her pram then as well. Had a sneaky look at the scales this morning. 1.3kg since Wednesday.....HELL YES! This is looking very real to be the first time that I might actually achieve something. I am a quitter. I always give up before things are finished. I am going to be strong this time! No falling off the wagon this time for me! I think staying on is going to be much better.

Oh mum took me shopping yesterday (lol yep 33 years old and my mummy still takes me shopping to make me feel better) :D. I got some new Nike Air Alaris (i think they are), the Nike +ipod attachment so I can acuralty measure how far im walking and in what time then finally, I got Mish's cook book. This should keep me honest until the round actually starts as well as help should there be anything I don't really like in the menus when they come out. I am not one for kangaroo, nor is my family so that night I can have a look through her cook book and have something else knowing it will still be good for me.

Anyways blog writing isnt helping me on my mission for today of getting at least one essay written! Will blog more later on this evening.

Mwah to all xoxo

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